“Matchmaker, matchmaker, find me a match. Catch me a catch.”
So goes one song in Fiddler on the Roof, sang by 3 young ladies. What if I could make a career out of matchmaking and respond to their request wrapped in that song?
Well, this is how I would do it. Let me count the ways.
1. Keep a clear motive. The goal should be to serve the interests of the two persons who will be involved. I would not do it just to make sure that a person meets one’s match or partner but I would ensure that they would benefit from being together — that the seed of love could grow from their finding each other. This, of course, leads us to the 2nd point.
2. Gather the right information. I won’t know if two persons would be a good fit for each other unless I know them well. As they say, information is power. What kind of personalities do they have? Complementary personalities would make for a great relationship. To ensure this, I might give them a personality quiz.
What is their family background like? How one is raised up greatly affects one’s relationship with others. I would ask information about the family they grow up with. This would also be helpful for them to process what their life was like then and how this could be significant in their own relationships now. What are their dreams in life? What are they passionate about? Shared interests can help two people build a friendship, a relationship.
I think what makes a relationship, what makes a match work is when people know themselves well and what they want. What are their religious beliefs? Some might say that faith or religion does not matter in their pursuit of a relationship. But I beg to disagree. It does matter. I mean, does anyone really want to be with someone who would ridicule what they believe in. I don’t think so.
This information can be gathered by meeting with them personally or through other channels like free dating sites where perhaps I could be one of the moderators.
3. Arrange dates in a more natural setting. Let’s face it. You might say WeLoveDates but when it’s time to meet each other face-to-face, it can be a little scary. And then our usual idea of a date is a fancy restaurant with nice food, great music and ambiance. And the persons on a date wearing what could be their “dress-to-impress” clothes. While I won’t say this is a bad thing — these dinner dates, I just think there are just other ways to meet and get to know each other.
What if the pair go on a nature hike instead, or perhaps check out the beach, or even visit a community center or animal shelter together? There should be several options on how they should meet or date. And I would ensure that they have a list of questions to ask each other! I mean, you won’t know each other better unless communication happens.
These would be the 3 things I would be sure to do should I ever find myself embarking on a matchmaking career. What about you? 🙂